Partner doesn’t share my spiritual path and views

Dear Lori and Jeff,

My partner and I have recently begun talking more seriously about marriage. He possesses many of the qualities I believe are important in a spouse; he’s genuinely kind, trustworthy, responsible and reliable, and we share many interests. We also have great chemistry and laugh often. However, I find myself deeply unfulfilled in the relationship when it comes to exploring spirituality. Yoga, meditation, and eastern-based health and wellness are integral to my lifestyle. I’d always imagined marrying someone I could practice with and who would help me continue to grow and expand in this realm. My partner is incredibly analytical and skeptical about much of what I believe in. He always supports me in doing what I want, but also politely chooses not to engage with me. Is this a dealbreaker?

Signed, Spiritually Unsatisfied

What to do when dating apps aren't working for you

Dear Lori and Jeff,

I ended a two-year relationship a few months before the pandemic hit and so, for almost a year and half, it’s just been my dog and me. I’m now fully vaccinated and things seem to be moving back in the right direction for a bit more normalcy in the world and I’d like to start thinking about dating again and possibly finding someone to spend the rest of my life with. I’ve tried dating apps in the past and have been reading about all the different strategies online but they all seem very impersonal and formulaic. I know I have some less-than-ideal dating patterns from the past that have landed me some less-than-ideal men so I’d like to figure some of those out along the way. Do you have any advice for both dating strategies and to help me understand my past patterns?

Ready To Date

Missing physical touch during pandemic online dating

Dear Lori and Jeff,

Physical touch is my love language. I’ve always used it as a way to test my level of interest in a guy—resting my hand on his leg, casually leaning up against him, even initiating the first kiss. That touch, and his response to it, was often my chemistry litmus test to assess how close I wanted to be to someone. But now with online dating, I’m struggling to gauge my interest in them. Even when I finally get to meet some of these guys in person, physical closeness is still off-limits. I’ve cycled through half a dozen guys in the last few months and am feeling more confused than ever. I want to be in a relationship but I don’t know how to get there when I’m six feet away. Help!

Signed, Out Of Touch

DatingLori KretJanuary 27, 2021Aspen Relationship Institutedating advice blog, dating app advice, online dating coachComment

Avoiding dating because afraid of making the same mistakes

Dear Lori and Jeff,

I quickly fell in love with my college sweetheart and we married right after we graduated. The marriage slowly deteriorated and we hung on for much longer than we should have. We finally ended things and I’m now a year out from the divorce. I feel like I’m ready to meet someone and have been dating for the last few months, but I’m so overwhelmed. I’m afraid if I connect with anyone I’ll fall too fast and make the same mistake again. So after a few dates I’m finding myself pulling away or coming up with excuses to cut it off. I really do want a relationship, but won’t let myself get attached. Please help.

Signed, Once Bitten

She Said, He Said: A Relationship advice blog written by Married, Marriage Therapists

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